Here we go. We're wrapping up November, and soon we'll be wrapping up everything to go under the tree. Christmas is coming, and although it may be the most wonderful time of the year for many of us, it's also the time when it seems we are doing nothing but spending money.
And if you've got kids in school, get ready. It's about to get a whole lot more expensive. One mommy blogger offered up her take on what to expect over the next few weeks, and it's hilarious but so true.
Friends, open your wallets. It's time to empty them.
Alana Smith, a nurse anesthetist and writer from Alabama, shares musings about parenting her two sons and life in general on her Facebook page Holy Moly Motherhood. Smith gets it. She knows how ridiculous this time of year is, and around this time last year, she put what we have all been thinking into words.
Smith pulled no punches. Even though we are all stretching our pennies as far as we can, schools want to get us for all we've got.
"The elementary school PTO be like: Heeeeeeeyyy! It's November, the most expensive time of the year. So here are a few things coming up," she wrote in the post.
First, it's picture day.
What is it about those photo packages? Every year they get more expensive and bigger. Who needs all of these photos? Smith certainly doesn't.
"FALL PICTURE DAY! $124 for a package that includes 14 wallets that no one has needed since 2004! Don't forget to notice the photo background options that include a beach in Fiji or a romantic Italian landscape, all appropriate options for our Alabama first graders!" the post continued.
Yup, we're already rolling on the floor.
She also warned that the kids are always getting their pictures taken straight from coming in from the playground, so they are in "their most 'natural state.'"
She went on about the book fair and canned goods drive.
Your kids definitely want to spend a few hundred dollars at the book fair every year, don't they? When was the last time they came home with a book? Posters and pens? Check.
"It's time for the BOOK FAIR! Please send whatever amount that you feel comfortable with for your child, but make sure it's enough so your child can buy at least three books … most children buy five books so please send $60, otherwise you can't keep up with the Joneses this week," she joked.
And of course she hit on the canned food drive and holiday shopping day. She noted that the school wants you to empty your entire pantry to donate — "Happy Thanksgiving." She also warned it's just about time to send money with your kids to shop for you for the holidays. Blank checks all around!
Remember treats and themed clothing days are coming, and none of that is free.
Smith doesn't want your kid to be the only one without ice cream on treat day and wanted to remind you to send in your money for that and an extra $1 for hat day.
Be ready to hit the craft store, because homemade gifts are coming, and you need to provide supplies so your kids can make you something to remember them by.
Certainly you want a yearbook, right? Be ready to fork out some money for that too. "And, we know that you are so poor already this month, and we really love to kick you when you are down! Pay $40 today!" she wrote.
Girl, facts.
Last but not least, get ready for the homework to pile on.
Not only are you broke, but Smith also recognized that your precious time is on the line this time of year as well, so school is bound to give you lots of extra homework. You know, to keep you on your toes.
Don't forget the gift cards either.
"And last but not least, attached are eight ALL ABOUT ME forms so that you can buy your teachers, counselors, lunchroom staff, librarian, bus driver, and music and art teachers their Christmas gifts! And of course, don't forget the PTO!!! We love Starbucks, Target, and crisp, cash bills," the post continued.
Parents everywhere get it.
No matter if you have one child or 20, parents feel the pain this time of year and they feel it in their souls.
"This is hilarious and when people told me that three kids were expensive, this isn't what I thought they were talking about," one mom joked.
"This is so freaking funny. Being an elementary parent can force you into bankruptcy," someone else wrote.
"Or how about "Let's order a 72.00 outfit your teen is literally only going to wear for this dance and you also need to buy some special Christmas pjs," another person shared.
Smith is glad the post has resonated with so many parents.
Smith told Today that she was inspired to write the post as the holiday reminders kept piling up for her sons, 8 and 3.
She hit her limit when "the Holiday Shop flyer that came home saying you could send a blank check with your child. I could only imagine the slime and erasers that would come home if I didn't set a limit," she explained.
She wrote the post quickly, but it had many people laughing.
"I wrote it in just a few minutes," she told the news outlet. "It just kept flowing. I'm glad people think it's funny."
Alana, thank you. We needed this laugh today. We feel seen. And parents, it's only a few more weeks. You'll make it. Just hand over your paycheck, and they'll find a way to spend it.
