In addition to celebrating a new life that's joining a family, a lot of drama can happen at a baby shower. Old friendship drama can reignite, former allies can become new enemies, and MILs can go wild. Even if a baby shower doesn't start as an episode of the Real Housewives, it can turn into that, which is what happened to one man, who said his cousin stole his credit card information during a recent family baby shower "to teach him a lesson."
All the Original Poster (OP) wanted was to have a good time at the baby shower.
As he explained on the Am I the A–hole forum on Reddit, he and one of his cousins are very close. So of course he wanted to go to the "big co-ed baby shower" she threw.
"Another cousin was visiting her parents, my aunt and uncle, and decided to attend the baby shower as well," he explained. "I'm not close to this cousin at all."
There's a 10-year age gap between the two cousins.
But the two are "obligatory Facebook friends" — "mostly due to my aunt and mother asking us both to add each other," he wrote.
Months later, the OP got a strange call from his bank.
He was told that he had an outstanding balance on his credit card, which was impossible because he "always paid" his bills on time.
"I told the bank employee I had not used my card, so that charge was fraud," he continued. "The card account was immediately closed, and they began the process of looking further into it."
Their investigation lead them to a large donation made in the OP's name that was charged to his card.
The problem was, the OP never donated to the organization. Looking to vent a little, he posted a short rant on Facebook about the situation.
"I got a few replies telling me this had never happened to them, and hoping I got it all resolved soon," he recalled. "Then my younger non-pregnant cousin commented something to the effect of 'Well, maybe someone had a good reason for making the donation in your name. Maybe someone wanted to teach you a lesson.'"
Her comment was definitely a head scratcher.
So the OP privately messaged her and asked her what she meant. It took a little prodding, but eventually she admitted to using his card to make the donation.
"Her reason? Because about a year ago I began going to church," he wrote.
The OP didn't grow up going to church and his family is not religious.
Although he believes going to church has given him peace of mind, he swears he doesn't "throw it in people's faces or demand they believe the same. It’s just something that I like for my own life," he explained.
"Apparently my cousin has a problem with me deciding to attend and join a church of any kind," he continued. "And because of that she decided it was a good idea to sneak around and take photos of my credit card."
She then used his info to donate to an organization that is "very outspoken about opposing what I believe morally."
"The organization is not anti-gay or anything like that. It's not Planned Parenthood either. FYI, I'm a gay male who is pro-choice so stop assuming I'm some kind of intolerant lunatic," he explained.
"My husband says I should press charges and have her arrested," he continued. "My mom says that's going too far, even though my cousin was in the wrong, because she's only 19."
"So WIBTA for pressing charges on my cousin and possibly ruining her life?" he asked.
People thought the OP needed to make his cousin pay for what she did.
"WHOA WHOA WHOA. Not the A–hole. PRESS CHARGES," one commenter advised.
"NTA — that's not a spiteful prank because she doesn't agree with your religion. That is seriously illegal and she needs to know that," someone else agreed. "I would definitely turn her in. That could have messed up your credit and your life. If there is any chance that she copied any other cards or information you should probably cancel them all and get new ones for yourself."
A third person put it this way:
"NTA, I do follow Jesus, and also support planned Parenthood and LGBTQ+ charities. That's based off my research and beliefs and you base your decisions off whatever research you've done and beliefs you have and your cousin has her own opinions too. That's how life works and it only works when you don't do malicious crap like steal credit cards. Your cousin needs to know how serious this is. It's not funny."
Later in the thread the OP described what the "charity" actually did.
It was "a local organization that routinely causes disruptions at funerals for first responders who they find out had religious affiliations," he explained. "They're very anti-religion and think no one should be able to have religious beliefs.
"Recently they threw a balloon full of black ink at the widow of a volunteer firefighter who died saving two kids from a house fire," he continued. "All because he was also the pastor of a small church. Like Westboro, but opposite in their beliefs. They're just a vile and disgusting group. But they do donate money to desperate people in need, so they call themselves a charity."
In the end, he decided to let his bank handle it.
"She's being held accountable by them," he explained. "I'm still undecided, as it's mostly out of my hands now."
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